‘Independent’ Married Woman? What Confusion!

It’s  no doubt, an ecstatic feeling being branded as an independent woman! But is the term ‘independence’ being grossly misunderstood in this contemporary age by the modern day women folks? Does this term get even seriously misinterpreted by today’s married women? Of late the views aired on various television channels through the programs relating to matrimony & marriages, somehow strongly display the mindset of today’s women on independency as just being directly proportional to their financial quotient; earning money more than or equivalent to their husbands and being increasingly conscientious about the progress in their professional carrier. 

But the big question here is, is it fair to define such a significant but gracious word in such a simple way? Perhaps not! As Maya Angelou says -"A bird doesn't sing because it has an answer, it sings because it has a song."Similarly a woman is not branded as independent because she has the power to spend; she is characterized to be independent by her belief in herself and her potential to get things done without depending on everybody for a majority of needs. When majority of people depend on her for their various needs, this I would call as independency. And these ‘dependencies’ are not most of the time, just financial. They can be physical, emotional, mental, material etc.

There are numerous attributes that compliment an independent woman, apart from the financial ability, which of course is vital. To name few-

1. It is important to define who and what you are for yourself. 
2. Care about other people. People who don't care about other people are not whole, and you can't be independent and strong if you're not whole. As Ms Sushmita Sen rightly said during the last round of the Miss Universe Pageant – “A woman is a gift of God. She teaches the world what caring, sharing and loving is all about!” That’s the essence of being a women 
3. Do not ever try to imitate men. Connect with yourself. Understand that you are a woman and you don't necessarily need to be like a man to be independent, many men are not independent, they could be financially independent, but not emotionally independent.
4. Accept responsibility for your life. Move from a "victim mentality" to a "creator mentality". 

There is also a very common thinking that those qualified & highly educated women who prefer to be a good home maker and progress in their personal life are not independent. Our belief that a highly educated woman should utilize all her knowledge for their professional life and not ruin the same by sitting at home looking after the daily chores, is not justified in my opinion. A successful personal life is equally important and education really helps in achieving the same as it facilitates proper decision making, which is integral for the happiness of the family. It’s relatively easy to choose one from Right Vs Wrong but it becomes increasingly difficult when you need to choose the best option from two wrong choices or two right choices! This is where the ‘education factor ‘comes into play.

To cut the long story short, Independence is about being flexible and adapting to changing situations. Independence is about being your own support system, independence is about accepting that you are responsible for anything and everything in your life and that YOU can change that whenever you wish. Independence is about trusting yourself, believing in yourself.